machination.org

It might be looking up by now, more vaccine available. Biden has moved the needles in certan specific ways.

And christ, every day I am saddened by the news of so many who have had it more worse than we have. But it’s been a fucking year. We can all say that. In my case:

• Just trying to be a first-time parent of an ~18mo
• Child care not stable (and no real rebound, backup)
• At least one close relative vax-hesitant
• Not getting to see family (or get their help) to the degree we would have with the kid if it weren’t a pandemic
• Being buzzed by Hueys on top of normal stupid helo traffic in this town
• Fences and razor wire cutting off main thoroughfares to rest of the city
• Most close friends have moved away
• Spouse doing double-time at her job, dictated by current events (and overwhelmed with the failure of policy to support a certain vulnerable population before COVID even became a thing)
• No time between anything, not if I’m going to keep (or set) pace at work and with the toddler.
• Sick of everything on a screen

I don’t need to go more than a block from my house to be reminded I’ve got it good.

Now, 17 blocks from my house or so… I’m reminded how good others have it to be able to control government from doing anything meaningful and honest for my needier neighbors, let alone the rest of us.

32-ish blocks, the great Not-Trump is still Ok doing illegal bombings with war powers he doesn’t have, never mind he shouldn’t have the ones he does have.

If there is a Biden win, how will you demonstrate against his platitudes and short-sells with regards to our future?

How will you celebrate his inauguration by attending and not letting him off the hook? How will you insist that he face our existential challenges with the broadest inclusion and the maximum effort possible?

One of the opportunities for Trump, besides giving space to the racists and mysgonists, and magnifying the likewise tendencies of those harboring fear, was the reality that so many folks were effectively written off cynically or by mealy-mouthed compromise-on-compromise by Democrats. The party became untrustworthy in their eyes. I dare say rightly so.

We desperately need something better than less worse, we need something better than “moving in the right direction.” We can’t afford to be placated.

How do we seize the opportunity so many argue is necessary to create by voting for Biden?

We need optimism, vigilance and action. Not mere relief and amenesia, I hope.

I’m not sure why the existential threats actually bearing down on us aren’t somehow apart of a every day proactive effort. Instead, in my country, we are preoccupied still with the horce race of how fascists are getting away with things and how other far milder corporate shills, who speak more compassionately to peoples fears but won’t actually do anything about them, may be preferable.

We get out and I am grateful that it isn’t as hard for us as it is for many.

But I could really use getting out.

Need a night or two on the AT by myself or something.

For too long this week I underestimated the power of a shower and some stretches. And breathing.

I would like standard keyboard shortcut conventions on macOS for showing sidebars and side panels and whatever.

I’ve got to remember one for BBEdit (cmd-0), another set for different Ulysses modes (cmd-1,2,3,4), no option for Notes (yes, I write stuff in all of these apps, maybe that’s part of the problem), something else for Things (cmd-/). I understand the “side bar" experience is slightly more complicated in a couple of these cases, but I feel like there could be a default behavior apps could add subtlety on top of.

I really like cmd-/.

I don’t appreciate notifications from apps that I actually want to use (for how long though, given this?) that are essentially coupons and marketing and not critical transactional updates, with no settings to “unsubscribe” from a type of notification. You know who…

Tooling around Heritage and Kingman Islands in DC today and trying to maintain distance … from other people and my house.

Crossing my fingers for John and Fiona Prine (and everyone else, and myself… but right now, John Prine and family).

“The lonesome friends of science say/ “The world will end most any day”/ Well, if it does, then that’s okay/ ‘Cause I don’t live here anyway/ I live down deep inside my head/ Where long ago I made my bed“

Our (the U.S.’s) late-December 2019/January for the SARS-CoV-2/COVID-19 for the Climate Crisis was 30-40 years ago.

Some compromises slow things down in order to turn a path forward into manageable steps and gain traction for each one, affording for inclusion, time for everyone to learn, agree, disagree, adjust, correct — iterate. That’s nice when there’s time and good faith.

It’s hard, can be complicated, full of nuance and tolerance of opposing skepticism or inclinations, harder for those with strong convictions, clarity of vision, and particularly the preponderance of data.

These are noble compromises.

Some compromises are not in good faith. They are pantomimes and designed to run out the clock. They’re exploits of vulnerabilities in whatever the established rules are. They’re worthless at best and weapons at worst — a dogma of centrism and “pragmatism” (for whom?) shielding greed.

I am sometimes very afraid we’re going to run out the clock.

Or we already have but our warped sense of time and consequences means we perceive the inevitable as in an indeterminite future?

Game over.

System crash.

I am trying to stay out of the little loops that steal time and presence; to enjoy the things I actually enjoy without getting trapped — by those things or by distractions.

Tonight finished some TV (or TV-like) stuff I have really enjoyed and then felt relieved. No rush to start something new. I did feel the need to read — newsletters and rss feeds, open browser tabs. I did. I also closed and rejected things I could not complete. I felt better.

Nourished and unburdened.

I confronted the urge to ignore tomorrow and took a peek. I might be better prepared because of it and able to sleep sooner.

This loop metaphor I’m running with is @craigmod’s about getting trapped, not attaining @randsinrepose.com’s flow. Staying outside the little loops gives you a chance at flow.

This town (Washington, DC) is a shitshow and it’s only too hip to know and to not know.

Sad that many of the people I’d most like to share and interact with in a rebooted, perhaps more ethical, social media are so uninterested in trying, given their experience with the crassness of Facebook, Twitter, etc (and many of their users).